I thought I’d turn this forum over to my practical get-through-life side for a few hours.
“Enjoy Yourself; It’s Later Than You Think”
It’s later by an hour, if you’re in the US and forgot to set your clocks ahead. Go, fix it now; I’ll wait.
Good. Let’s move on.
“Watching the Clothes Go ‘Round”
How much dishwasher or laundry detergent should you use? An expert at the NY Times says it should be a lot less than we normally use. And don’t self-clean the oven right before a party.
There are also definitive instructions on how to load the dishwasher properly. Of course, my wife may disagree. So she loads her way, I load mine, and we agree to disagree but not rearrange each other’s dishes.
“Can You Feel the Love Tonight”
The Hurt Locker won. Get over it. I wish I knew how to say that in Nav’i.
Avatar was the biggest seller of the year, but that doesn’t mean it was the best film.
The biggest selling album of 1967 was Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, right? Abbey Road, of course, in 1969. Born to Run in 1975.
Hey, Jude topped the charts in 1968 longer than Bobby Goldsboro’s Honey. Light My Fire was a chart-topper longer than To Sir, With Love in that year. In 1969, the longest chart-topper was a great Beatles song.
All of these statements are false.1967′s biggest seller was More of the Monkees — not even “The Best of.” At least it had I’m a Believer on it. In 1969, it was Iron Butterfly’s In-a-Gadda-da-Vida. And 1975 brought us Reg Dwight’s Greatest Hits — or, rather, Elton John’s Greatest Hits. It wasn’t Born to Run, but I can’t argue with someone who chose his stage name to honor the great Long John Baldry and the sax player in Baldry’s band, Elton Dean.
And in 1969, the records atop the charts the longest were In the Year 2525 (Exordium and Terminus) — yes, that was the name of it, by one-hit wonder Zager and Evans — and Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In (The Flesh Failures) — again, that was the name, by the Fifth Dimension, who at least weren’t a one-hit wonder and whose covers brought attention to the otherwise overlooked Laura Nyro.
Avatar may have outsold The Hurt Locker 10:1, but that doesn’t mean it was better. More of the Monkees outsold Astral Weeks and Forever Changes 10:1 too.
(If you haven’t heard Van Morrison’s Astral Weeks and Love’s Forever Changes, listen to them and hear two of the most influential-on-other-musicians albums of all time.)
“Happy Birthday to You”
This bit of highly practical advice is directed at me. It’s my wife’s birthday, and I want to acknowledge her in print. Or in electrons….
